Dying Is An Art
by ReddistheRose
Summary: Death and time, rage and love. What is endless, and what is transitory? Deep into her feelings and way past her imagination, Cindy learns that she, like life, is full of surprises. Chapter 13
1. Chapter 1

**AN:** Okay, you might think I'm crazy, but I'm starting another one...I like to have lots of irons in the fire, so to speak...This one is very...angsty. Gosh, I do alot of these dramatic things, huh? Let me know what you think...lame? Good? Tissue- inspiring? What? I need to know!

Please, please, please review!

(By the way, I just want to use this op. to thank Averil Lavine (who's name I just _cannot_ seem to spell), for the song "_Slipped Away_", that I listened to _constantly_ while writing this chapter. If you have this song handy, I suggest listening to it while read this, it really sets the mood.)

_Disclaimer: Dying is an art, just like everything else- Sylvia Plath_**

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**Chapter 1**

"I'm so _sorry_."

The blonde teenager said, the words falling from her mouth in a desperate whisper. Blinking back tears, she ran her hand over the smooth surface of the coffin before her. "…Jimmy."

She gasped out the word, and as she began to sob, she held the paper before her.

"I'm so sorry that I called you _names_." She read from the paper in her hands, even though she knew the words by heart. "I'm so sorry that I never _appreciated_ you." She had written the list over the course of the sleepless week. It was all the things she wanted to say…now she would never have the chance. "I'm so sorry that I never gave you any credit. I'm so sorry…that...sorry..."

She paused. Even now, as she cursed herself, she couldn't say the words. "...I'm so...sorry that I never…told you…how I felt about you..."

She couldn't finish. Dropping the paper that had become to heavy to hold, she feel to her knees softly. All alone in the room, she leaned against the wall behind her. The flowers in the room were smothering, sickly sweet. Why were they allowed to live, when he wasn't here?

She still couldn't believe it. Things like this only happened to _other_ people. She didn't bother to wipe away the tears as she recalled the horrifying events of late. The news channels still played the headlines. _"Teen Genius Found Dead, Experts Blame Technical Problem", "Town Hero No More"…"Family and Friends Mourn Loss of Local Genius."_

Would they ever stop playing in her head?

She remembered the numb feeling she had gotten, the day her nightmare began.

_…(Multiple flashbacks)..._

_"We go live to the scene, as police still are searching the area for any sign of the missing boy. The wreckage is appalling- apparently, the young man lost control of his rocket and careened off course into the area of the Punth river dam._

_The police have recovered the debris…they doubt James Neutron has survived the crash- they are still searching for the body."_

…

_"James Isaac Neutron,Retroville'svery own boygenius, has been pronounced dead at 4:25 this morning. Search and rescue found the young man downriver, the tragic end to a frantic investigation. The boy's parents, Hugh and Judy Neutron, received the horrifying news early this morning._

_Our prayers are with them."_

_…_

_"...Apparently, James Neutron had been reported missing 7 days ago, and an extensive search was begun Friday night..._

_"He always left us notice if he was going to be gone for a few days," His mother informed the police. "He never just…disappears."_

_Sadly, the nightmare has ended in a most appalling way. The body of James Isaac Neutron was found early morning yesterday, and he was pronounced dead at 4:25._

_Friends and family are still in shock from the incident. "He was an excellent flyer- I don't understand what happened." His father, Hugh Neutron, told us. "Why didn't he use the ejector seat? There wasn't even a distress signal. I don't understand. Why- why Jimmy?"_

_Apparently, experts have determined the problem in wiring in the rocket, which caused the computer to shutdown. The ejector seat, the only way to exit the vehicle in an emergency, had been jammed. In the panic, experts say, James must have started to try to repair the damage, but was unable, as the rocket struck the edge of the dam, sending him careening out of the vehicle." _

_…_

_"There will be a funeral for James Isaac Neutron at 6:00 tomorrow evening, at Fieldsman's Funeral Home._

_The family of the deceased invite all friends of James to attend."_

_…(End flashbacks) ..._

She didn't hear the footsteps approaching.

"Cindy?"

She opened her eyes to the sound of the voice.

"Hello, Mrs. Neutron." She whispered.

The woman before her stood uncertainly, her hands clasped around a tissue. "Are you alright?"

Cindy looked at her in amazement. After all she had been through, she was still comforting others. "I'm…okay."

"I don't think any of us are…okay."

Cindy couldn't help the tear that fell.

"I just…I just wanted you to know…any time you would like to come over for a visit, you're welcome. Jimmy's lab…" She looked down sorrowfully. "You're welcome to use it, if you like. I know you were one of the only ones who loved science as much as he did."

Cindy's heart broke as she thought of working in his lab. How she had _wanted_ to work in it…with him.

"Thank you." Was all she was able to muster.

Judy turned to leave. "Oh," she said, turning suddenly. "Cindy, I-"she swallowed. "They found Goddard's…parts. If anyone could repair him, I know it would be you…if you would like to. I think…I think Jimmy would have wanted it that way."

Cindy stood slowly, nodding finally. "Of course…I mean, I'll try."

"Cindy…" Judy walked over to her. Suddenly stretching out her arms, she wrapped Cindy up in a hug. "You were like a daughter to me, always. Never think any different."

Cindy began to cry again, feeling the motherly warmth from the woman who held her now. How she wished her own mother would comfort her! But Cindy's mother did not cry. Her mother did not mourn. Her mother…didn't feel anything. Feelings were weakness, and a Vortex woman was not weak.

They finally pulled away, and Judy smiled a bit, softly, then left.

Once again, Cindy was alone.

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AN:

Continue, yay or nay? Review, review, review, ppl!


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: **Wow. (Is shocked) Y'all actually LIKED it. Huzzah! I'm so happy! (squeals in glee) Hmm. It's hard to post a angsty chappie when you're so review-high...nah, it's not!

CynthiaAuroraNeutron; snowboarder9: Thanks!

EL CHUPACABRA: Hey, Chup! Thanks for dropping by! (Everyone else: check out this author's stuff! It's fantastic!) Just between you and me, I do have an actuall plot under all this angst, so keep in tune!

acosta pérez josé ramiro: Hello again! Hmm...sadly enough, that never ocurred to me...(Plot idea!) (Blatently steals plot idea)

kingdom219? X 100,000? YES!

Ricochet Days: Thanks! Sorry I made you snifle! Well...not really. ; )

teejayvortex: Aw, sorry you're depressed. I'm afraid you're going to get more in this chap...But, that's why you're reading this, right: )

Mrs.Caulfield: Oke-dokie!

I love you guys! Thanks for reveiwing!

Disclaimer:_ He has gone over to the majority. -Petronius_

(Note: _Italics _are sometimes for stress, but in this chap, it's her thinking. Hope it's not too confusing! Let me know, k?)

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Chapter 2

She ran, feeling the cold wind, teasing, embracing her. The winter had gone, but it hadn't yet released it's grip on the small town. With every step, her breath reminded her to keep going, and the pain reminded her she was still alive.

At least something did.

_Breathe-_ She reminded herself. _Just keep breathing_. It was all she could do, all she would allow herself to think about- until she turned the corner, onto her path of memories. The candy shop came into view, the flood of memories taking over her. The fighting- the laughing. Those few precious times when they had come so close- so close to giving in.

She had been so close to telling him.

Looking back, she let a tear fall for the irony of it all. What had she been so afraid of? Rejection was better than indecision. Wasn't it? Or was she doomed to always wonder?

_What if-_ Again, she started the sentence that had become the theme of all her thoughts. _What if_ she had told him? _What if_ he had felt the same way? _What if_ he hadn't? _What if-_

She finally stopped, doubled over with the sudden pain of a piercing thought. _What if_ she could have prevented it? _Was it possible?_ Cause and effect- how many times had she used that formula? One change- one action- one word- could alter a life. Could she have altered his? Would it have made any difference if she had finally given in, taken down her defenses?

She allowed the words to escape her mouth in a whisper that tickled her lips. "I love y-" She gasped with pain as she began to cry again, allowing the truth of the matter to sink in. Desperately, she spoke the fact again, in the tense that had become all too real.

"I lov_ed _him." She cried, whispering again into the early morning breeze. "_I loved him_."

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She opened the door, softly shutting it behind her. Turning toward her room, she was given a start at the form of her mother standing there.

Her mother. In suit-dress and heels, she was all business. "I'm about ready to go. Are you ready for school?

"Spring break, mom." Cindy replied, mechanically. _Like I told you last week- and the week before that- not to mention yesterday._

"Right." Grabbing her briefcase, the brisk air about the woman flowed between them, allowing them both to feel the gap between them. "Don't forget, I'll be back in 3 days. Do your chores."

Cindy nodded, before replying in turn. "I'm staying with Libby." There was a pause, and Cindy felt the ice cold feeling creeping up on her again. "If…that's okay."

The lines on her face grew tighter as she replied to her daughter. "…Of course."

_No fighting today,_ Cindy thought, busying herself with a bowl of cereal. _Please, not today_.

Her mother paused at the door, watching her daughter ignore her. She hesitated. If this were 4 or 5 years ago, they would have hugged- said goodbye like a normal family. Where had she gone wrong?

With a final sigh, she left without a sound. Cindy let out a breath she never realized she was holding. _Relief_- she was ashamed to admit the feeling to herself. _Relived to be alone-_ away from the uncomfortable silences of family.

Her family.

She looked out the window, watching her mother escape. Escape the truth- escape her feelings.

Cindy was jealous. There was no escape from _her_ demons.


	3. Chapter 3

AN:Sorry for the long wait...very busy this time of year. Thanks, reviewers!

**greg9570:** Sorry if it was confusing...it's not a flashback at all, it's just as it sounds, she was out running, then went home where she ran into her mom. i'll try to be more clear in the future, please be patient!

**AScreamInTheNight:** Thank you! High school lit classes finally pay off!

**snowboarder9:** Hey! Quit following me! - Of course I'll read your stories! Give me a few days, I'll make the time!

**acosta pérez josé ramiro; crazybluephantom:** Thanks!

**EL CHUPACABRA:** Always a pleasure to make you sniffle! (Note to readers: check out this writer's stories...I luv em! Especially "My faveorite penpal"...good stuff...and don't let this go to your head, Chupa!)

Disclaimer: _"To belive with certainty we must begin with doubting." - Stanislaw I, king of Poland _

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**Chapter 3**

She hesitated, feeling the night air around her. Feeling like an intruder, she looked at the shiny sensor before her. It had been a while since she had stood in this spot. She fingered the hair in her pocket carefully. It was hard to believe…hard to imagine that it was the last remnant of him.

She held it, finally, before the scanner.

_"Welcome, Jimmy"_

The words had never sounded to eerie as they did to her now. The computer, for all it's dictionary use of words, could never have pieced together an original thought. It had no idea why, if it knew at all, Cindy was wiping away a tear as she stepped in.

The lab. It was filled with so many memories…from the Yolkian attack to Jimmy's first Nobel prize at 13. She looked around herself, taking in the familiar sights, smells, sounds.

Walking over to the experiments, she couldn't help but smile. He still had the girl-eating plant after all this time…"_Just in case_", he had told her.

Turning from the specimens, she taken aback by the sight of what lay on the table before her.

It was Goddard. Or, at least, it had been. She had never seen him in so many pieces. Her forehead crinkled in pain for him…even if he was only a robot dog…he was Jimmy's best friend.

She picked up a piece of him. Fingering it softly, she thought to herself. Could she really put him together? With a struggling sigh, she started picking up pieces, trying to see where they fit.

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4 hours later, she fell to a chair with a frustrated grunt. _"I can't do this_." She thought, desolately. _"Jimmy built him…and I'm no genius."_ She rubbed her face with her hands, glancing at the clock. It blinked a miserable 1:26 a.m.

She wanted to cry so badly…but there were no more tears. Why couldn't she just do this one last thing for Jimmy? She knew how it would feel to have Goddard again. It was like resurrecting a piece of Jimmy…but she couldn't even do that. She looked around the lab, distracting her mind from the pain.

"I'm not a genius. How am I supposed to do this?" She said to herself again, before her eyes caught sight of poster on the wall. Her eyes flitted over the picture of Albert Einstein, reading the words written beneath.

_It is only by standing on the shoulders of giants that we may see the future!_

She tilted her head, considering the words. "It means to use other people's knowledge to add to your own, of course." She smiled fakely to herself. "At least I can figure out a dumb poster." Stopped for a moment, the words finally sank in. "Jimmy's knowledge…that's what I need. I need to work with what he knew." Her mind clicked into motion, using the scientific reasoning Jimmy had drilled into her every time he opened his mouth.

"So…how do I do that?" She asked herself, keeping her mind distracted from the thought of Jimmy by talking aloud.

Suddenly, her gaze fell on him computer. Walking over to it, she sat in the seat, sadly remembering who it belonged to. It was a small consolation that she had to adjust the seat higher to get in. It reminded her of all the times they had teased each other…

She lay her hands on the keyboard, a bit lost. Glancing up at the screen, she took a deep breath, and started to type.

_"Password required!"_ The computer interrupted, with a glaring beep.

Cindy blinked at the message, then flew into a rage with herself. "I'm useless! Can't I get _anything_ done?" She screamed, leaping to her feet. "I'll _never_ be able to fix Goddard! I'll never be able to do _anything_!"

She stopped herself. There was no one to hear her words…no way for anyone to know what kind of pain she was in as she deposited her hands on her face.

"Not without Jimmy…"


	4. Chapter 4

AN: Ah, dumb browser...now I have to type this all again! Oh, well.

Hi, everyone! I hope you like this chap, I treid not to go to overboard with Cindy's IQ, but wanted to make the point that she's smarter than she thinks she is. Let me know how it is! (And if I messed up with any facts...all I did was pull it off a website, I have no idea if it's right or not! Don't flame me! I'll be good!)

By the way, I'm definatly open to sugestions for the password...any ideas? (Not _extremly_ obvious or very _boring_...I can come up with _those_ on my own, lol!)

Ppl who rock my writer's world: (I.E. Reveiwers):

**acosta pérez josé ramiro:** Thanks for the genius ideas! (pun intended!)

**kingdom219:** Silence, guesser of secrets! Or I shall summon my Mysteriously Aquired Log of Doom and smash you! (lol, just kidding!)

**snowboarder9:** lol, don't be scared off, i was just kidding: ) Stalker, reveiwer...makes no difference to me: D

**stefinable:** WHERE'S MY **CHOCOLATE**? (maybe you left it in Canada, with the Amsih!) lol, luv ya, girlfriend!

**Elynsynos 18:** Thank you! That is SUCH a wonderful thing to hear from a reviewer, I can't tell you. Please keep reading!**

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**Chapter 4**

Leaning on the computer keyboard, she rested her pounding head. "_Please_" she whispered low, "Please let _something_ go right"

With a click, there was a voice behind her.

"May I help you, miss?" The synthesized voice said soothingly. Turning to the voice in surprise, Cindy glanced down at the series of buttons. She must have pressed one to call up the hologram before her!

"Who are _you_?" She asked, stalling, as she gazed at the apparation.

"May name is a series of letters and numbers, miss. I have not been named for actual use yet. It is: 7787wj1iop9h14s607. I will, however respond to any given name."

Cindy blinked at the creature. It was the face and torso of an adult, smiling and kind. With a half-smile, she replied to him."How about if I just call you Fred?"

"Very well, miss. May I ask _your_ name?"

"Cindy."

He continued to wait, hands behind what could be seen of his back.

"er, Cinthya Aurora Vortex."

He appeared to be thinking for a moment. "Very good, miss. Yes, you are indeed in my database. Now, how may I help you, Cindy?"

She let out a breath slowly, puffing out her cheeks as she thought. "You don't happen to have to computer password, do you?"

He looked hesitatingly at her, finally giving her a pained expression. "While I am loathe to deny a request, I can not give you that information."

"Of course." She murmured. "Nothing is that easily."

"And, I'm sorry to have to remind you that it is unkind to try to nose about in other people's computers."

She ignored him, and turned to the screen once more. Taking a breath again, she lifted her hands to the keys. She would just have to do some major-league guessing.

_Jimmy Neutron _

_brain blast _

_Goddard _

_Jimmy _

_Neutron _

_Neutron, Jimmy_

Her fingers flew over the keys, trying anything that popped into her mind.

"Cindy?" Fred asked, interrupting her thoughts for only a moment before she returned to the matter at hand.

"Mmm." She replied.

"You really are _not_ allowed to use that machine."

"Yep." She agreed.

_Girleatingplant _

_Nerdtron _

_Whippy-dip-head _

_Fred _

_Sheen _

_Carl_

She sighed. There were endless possible passwords!

"And, well, I hate to do it," He said, "But if you do not cease attempting to access that database, I will have to _remove_ you from it."

This caught her attention. With an angry look, she gave him a disbelieving stare. "You are a _hologram_, Fred." She said, slowly.

"Who is connected to several self-defense systems within the lab." He said, in a surprisingly icy tone.

"I'm not leaving, Fred."

His gaze turned to stone. "Yes, you are. Only Jimmy Neutron is authorized to access-"

She cut him off with a raised tone. "Don't start with me, you overrated radio wave! I know it belongs to Jimmy Neutron! That's not going to help him now, is it! He's dead!" She cut herself short now, feeling sick at her own words.

Fred paused, thinking again…accessing some hidden database of his own. "I see."

"No." She said, whispering, "You could never see. You're a stupid machine! How could you-" This time, it was Fred who cut her short.

"In case of the demise of Jimmy Neutron," he recited, suddenly very mechanical sounding, "all data bases and lab resources are open to the first one to answer a series of questions."

She looked at him in amazement. "Questions?"

"Do you wish to proceed?"

"…yes."

"Question one: What is the analog of the Rydberg formula?"

She blinked at him. Jimmy had programmed his stupid hologram to spout off College-level physics questions! Well, she was no genius, but she _did_ know her physics.

"Show that the correspondence principle is satisfied for all values of the quantum number n used in quantizing the angular momentum." She replied after a moment of thought. Her mother's insistence on preparing early for College was paying off.

"Question 2: What is the Bohr quantization rule?"

"The Bohr quantization rule corresponds to setting the magnitude of the angular momentum to be a multiple of h bar." She began, without hesitation. "For a circular orbit, this means that you set m v r n hbar . To find the analogue of the Rydberg formula, just consider the transition between states with different energies which would give you the energy of an emitted photon. The correspondence principle states that in the limit of large n, one should recover the classical results." She finished at last, not really paying attention to her own answer. _Why would Jimmy have these questions?_ She wondered to herself. _Anyone with an interest in physics could answer those. Of course, whoever got down here would have to have had a hair of his…was he rooting out possible saboteurs_?

"Final question." Fred stated, looking at her unfalteringly.

"Yes?" She prompted, bringing her mind back to the moment.

"What is your favorite ice cream flavor?"

She looked at him incredulously. "Are you _serious_?"

He looked at her, clearly confused. "Of course."

She thought about that. What was the correct answer? Should she answer Sheen's flavor? Carl's? Jimmy's parents?

She was tired of playing games.

"…pecan ripple." She answered, truthfully, letting her shoulders drop in attempt to not get her hopes up.

For a heartbreaking second, Fred said nothing.

Finally, he smiled. "That is correct, Cindy."


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: **First off, let me apologize for the shortness of this chapter...and for the loooong update time...what can I say? It's harvesting season? Thanks for sticking with me, here, ppl! I hope I make it worth your while, lol!

Reveiwers:

**pokey; snowboarder9:** Thanks!

**LadyEsca:** Wow! Thank you for such praise...I hope I can keep living up to it! And, don't worry- i didn't understand a word of the physics stuff either- I got it from a collage-level topic board. wink

**Elynsynos 18:** Uh, oh! I hope you can't guess- that would take away the fun, lol! (What did you think is going to happen? Now I'm all curious!) :)

**acosta pérez josé ramiro; Readrbug21:** Yeah, I liked how it turned out- I never really planned that part, but Fred worked good too, I think. Thanks!

**crazybluephantom:** Thanks for the suggestion! I kinda used it...(mysterious glances)

...By the way, can anyone figure out the meaning behind the password? Hee-hee! Let me know if you want me to tell you in the next chappie's author note...

**Disclaimer:** _Sleep is the best cure fr waking troubles.-Spanish Proverb_

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**Chapter 5**

She kept her eyes on the screen as her fingers rested over the keyboard lightly.

"_Ice cream flavor?" _She thought, unable to understand what Jimmy Neutron had been thinking- a feeling that was familiar. "_Why ask that? And why…"_ She paused for a moment to rub her eyes in confusion. "_Why would my flavor be the answer?" _She glanced at the dismembered parts of Goddard. It was heartbreaking to think of the work ahead of her. "_He left it to me," _she thought, not a question or a statement. "_But why?"_

She left the questions to wait while she forced herself to concentrate at the screen before her now.

"Password required", it continued to blink.

She took a breath and smoothed her hands over the keys to answer the request. _2/3-4/3-6/2-3/1-9/3-_ the combination flew from her harried mind as she recalled the directions of Fred.

"Command?" The computer flashed, sensible black on red background blaring at her.

"Schematics", she guessed.

Instantly, an overbearing list of numbers and letters were before her. Drawing up a weary sigh, she searched for the button she wanted.

"Search…"

"Goddard"

Once more, the amazing machine produced before her pages of information.

With one more glance at the clock, she rubbed her eyes, and began to read.

It seemed like hours later when she stumbled back to the computer for the umpteenth time to refer to the drawings.

"Urg!" The sound curdled in her throat. She slammed down in the seat as she looked over at her handiwork again.

It seemed she was going in circles…if she was even going anywhere.

"Disconnect to the-" She mumbled to herself, after beginning to read once more. "Great. Just perfect." She walked over to the mess that had once been Jimmy's friend. "Now I only have to undo a hours worth of work and put in another five hours."

Fred, who had been watching this procession, spoke yet again. "Cindy?"

"Mmm." She grunted, trying to delicately turn the screwdriver in her awkward half-upside down position.

"May I offer a suggestion?"

She rolled her eyes in response, growing very annoyed with the hologram.

"You need to get some rest. You're growing to tired to be constructive."

"Sure." She grunted again. "_ARG_!" In a familiar fashion, the screwdriver, under pressure, flipped from her hand. "NO!" She kicked the table in frustration.

"You are exhibiting classic signs of sleep deprivation, Cindy. Restlessness, carelessness-"

"Why don't you take your _suggestion _and go-"

"-and anger." He finished, raising an eyebrow at her.

She glared at him.

"Don't make me sedate you." He finally said.

Her mouth flung open. "What?"

"Self defense mechanism #457. I am prepared for every eventuality."

Suddenly, the fatigue was too much. She began to chuckle. "Really? _Anything_? You're prepared to deal with an overtired 19 year old bent on repairing Goddard at 5:43 in the morning? How about killer scotch tape? Or attacking squirrels?" She began to laugh hysterically.

Fred rolled his eyes at her. "Sarcasm and squirrel thwarting aside, you need rest, Cindy. Come on, you know you need to sleep."

Her hysterics melted away as she felt tears rolling down her face. "I can't sleep…I can't! I have to finish it!" She sobbed, searching for the screwdriver franticly. "I have to- I have- I…"

She didn't get to finish.

"Goodnight, Miss Vortex." Fred whispered as the assistant robot lifted her from where she had dropped. "See you tomorrow."


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: **All the usual apologies for long update times apply, I'm afraid- I'm trying my best, everybody! Thanks so much for being so paitient, and thanks to all the wonderful-

**Reveiwers:**

**rikagirls;**ignite444; snowboarder9;pokey Thanks for reveiwing! I hope you enjoy this chapter- reveiw if you do!

**kingdom219:** I hope you like this chapter, then! (please, one request, no swears in the reveiws: my little sister reads them. Thanks!)

**crazybluephantom; **CindyNeutron3 Sorry to frustrate you, haha! I'm putting a clue at the bottom of the page, blocked off a bit.

**LadyEsca:** Ah, well, it's sort of a mix of him, and Data (Star Trek), and Watson (Sherlock Holmes) and...yeah, I don't know, lol!

**acosta pérez josé ramiro:** See the hint for the password below!I agree- Cindy has to argue with _somebody_! haha!

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_Disclaimer: Death, that elusive eventuality. - Me, all poetic and junk._

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**Chapter 6**

She awoke on the cot, with the remains of a headache at the edge of her brain. Rising from her position, she blinked her fatigued, red-rimmed eyes, as the blur left her vision.

"Fred?" She asked, quietly.

"Yes, Miss Vortex?"

"What time is it?"

"4:36 in the afternoon."

"Ugh." She contemplated. "Of what day?"

"Saturday, April 9th."

"Ech." She replied, pulling her fingers through her hair.

"I am quite sorry I had to resort to-"

"Yeah. I know. It's okay. I wasn't thinking very clearly." She cut him off, not ready to hear his voice in what seemed to her biological clock to be the early morn. Refusing to look at the pile of work that remained for her on the table, she winced through her stretches as she asked of Fred: "Got a coffee maker in here, Fred?"

With a serene nod, he gestured toward a door on her left which she had not noticed. She walked slowly to it, and reached for a handle that was not there, just as the door slid open.

"Automated sliding door, Miss Vortex." Fred reprimanded her.

"Ah. Yes, of course."

She entered the kitchenette, and went to the corner containing the cherished caffeine creator. She allowed herself a smile at it. "Gosh, Nerdtron," She said, with a chuckle. "You couldn't even leave the coffee maker alone?" Indeed, the simple machine had become a behemoth of wires and tubes, wrapping within itself to present an awesome display of lights and sounds. It beeped and whizzed to life when her hand touched the surface of the fabrication.

"Good morning," It purred, in a voice conducive to attending to the tired, and thus, easily irritable. "How may I serve you today?"

"What've you got?" She asked, taken aback at the lack of buttons where she was accustomed to them.

"The Neutron Coffee Output System Deluxe 3.6 can make an endless variety of coffee and coffee substitutes, Miss Vortex." Fred instructed her now, having materialized beside her at her question.

"Why can't he ever name something less than four syllables? Or even four words?" She asked herself. Turning once more to the machine, she shrugged. "I don't know…" She said, debating her tastes.

"Would you like to try my automated search system?"

"The who-whatzit?"

"Simply open your mouth, and a brief scan will ensure that you receive the perfect coffee!" The chipper mechanism replied. "After determining your precise taste bud sequence, I will be able to discern your ideal coffee based beverage!"

Cindy smiled, as she shook her head. "Oh, no you don't- I've heard this song and dance before. How about we start with a plain old black coffee and see where we go from there?"

"Right away!" It chirped, and it set to motion, churning and whirring.

While she awaited her wake-me-up, she took a moment to survey the room. "You've been holding out on us, Neutron." She murmured, feeling the sound of his name on her tongue.

It was a small room, to be sure, but well suited to long hauls- upon checking the small (also 'improved') refrigerator, she found it to be well stocked. She reached for the milk. "Glad it's not…spoiled," she reasoned; then she wished she hadn't, as she thought of what would happen to the milk- to the lab- if she were to never visit.

"Oh, no, Miss." Fred assured her, unaware of the tears welling dangerously at her eyes, "That wouldn't happen, I assure you. The computer system, to which I have constant access, makes sure that the refrigerator is always in perfect stock- no spoiled food."

"I see." She said, putting the milk back. "And you would care for the lab, wouldn't you?"

"Of course! I take care of repairs, food stock, and cleaning as well as other systems." He said, confidently.

"Sure." She whispered, tearing the tears from her eyes with a wipe of her arm. "No need for me to stick around, then."

"Excuse me, Miss?" Fred asked, confused.

"After I finish repairing Goddard- _if _I do-" She said, reaching for her finished coffee, "I'll just lock up."

"But-"

"No buts." She shook her head, allowing the tears to form without hindrance now. "I can't stand to be in here- surrounded by…him."

"Who?"

"Jimmy." She whispered.

He paused, allowing this to transfer into his memory banks.

"You don't understand- you couldn't, you're just a computer." She continued. "He's everywhere in this lab. Everywhere I turn, there's a piece of him- of his life- right there."

"Yes, I don't understand," Fred agreed. "For it seems to me that the absence of a friend would be eased by remembrance, would it not?"

"Not when they're never coming back, Fred."

"I see." He said, after a pause. "Perhaps, Cindy," He said gently, "You shall change your mind with time. For I see that humans are easily diverted from logical conclusions by emotion." He sighed. "Please excuse me momentarily, Miss Vortex, as I must see to an experiment."

"Sure." She accepted, and in the flash of a second, he dissipated.

So she sat alone, sipping her coffee, trying not to let her tears drip into it.

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AN: Sorry for the shortness- I'm a bit close on time tonight. PASSWORD CLUE BELOW! Spolier, I guess?

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**Okay, here is the clue(s):**

2/3-4/3-6/2-3/1-9/3 is the code.

Each set of numbers can be seprated to help find the answer- so you have 5 coloums of two numbers:

2/3

4/3

6/2

3/1

9/3

Now you have to figure out what each set could refer to.

Does secret code _ring_ a _bell_?

(Yes, I italisized those words for a reason! I'll give more clues if asked!)


	7. Chapter 7

**AN:** _YES!_ My computer is actually letting me access the internet! Yes, my fellow fanfic-ers, I actually had an excuse for not updating this time. Please, please forgive the wait and drop a review- let me know you're still out there!

In this chapter, we'll see Cindy making a little bit of progress on Goddard. Like I said before, there _is_ a plot in here, under all the angst, heh. nd a cookie goes to anyone who can pointout th tworefrences in this chap. One of them should be easy...Thanks to all those beutiful-

**Reveiwers:**

**penandsword1:** Thanks! And, great guess with wedding bells, but not quite...

**Spuffyshipper:** Hey, that's a cool idea! I might use it for a one shot sometime, if you don't mind?

**kingdom219:** You said: "unless it goes with the ABCs". If you're meaning what I think you mean, you're on the right track...

**OCEANLANE:** Ah! A fellow Lost fan! Go Charlie! Go Charlie! W00t!

**acosta pérez josé ramiro:** As usual, a pleasure to hear from you! Thanks for the review. By the way, what is your native language? (Not that I can't guess...)

**romancejunkie:** Nice name, haha. Don't worry, you'll get your fill! Hang in there!

**snowboarder9:** Cool guess, but not quite.

**crazybluephantom:** Haha! In the meantime, here's another chapter, k?

**RavenandBB4life:** That's okay. I'll tell you eventually. Maybe. HAHA! (Coff)

_**Disclaimer:** Memory of happiness makes misery woeful. -Unknown_

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**Chapter** **7**

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-_Click_-

With the metallic noise in her immediate past, she twisted her neck to face the directions once more. "Okay," she mumbled to herself, "The outer casing is assembled." Taking a moment to survey her handiwork, she smoothed her hand over the shell. It was cold- lifeless. The husk before her, she knew, was only a representation of what he had once been- alive. Would she be able to revivify him?

Standing now, she closed her eyes to feel the import of her stretching muscles. "It's a good thing," she mused, "That mom is gone. Not that she'd miss me." She allowed herself a sarcastic gargled noise- the laugh that went wrong. "No, of course she would- I'm in charge of the dishes."

As she swept up some stray bits of matter, brushing them into her hand, she thought for a moment on her friends. "Libby probably told everyone that I went with my mom on vacation- like I told her." She walked to the garbage, pausing above it to shake her head at herself. "I hate lying to her."

"Lying is a deplorable practice, Miss Vortex." Fred reprimanded, solemnly appearing by her side once more.

"Thank you, Fred." She remarked, sarcasm hidden just enough to avoid detection by the holographic companion. He walked through him to reach the operating table once more. "I don't suppose," She asked, over her shoulder, "You could tell me where to find a ¾ inch wrench?"

"Third shelf, fifth drawer from the bottom, second compartment, second on the left."

Following the directions, she guided her hand through the seeming maze of options. "Good memory." She commented.

"I am a computer, after all, underneath this brilliant A.I engine."

"I see," Cindy laughed, as she closed the drawer, "that you inherited that Neutron Ego problem."

"Ego problem?"

Cindy rolled her eyes. "Enter the denial. Nevermind." She sighed, as she arrived at the former pet, and reached for the directions. "Okay. Next. Page 247." Taking up her tool, she continued chatting, keeping occupied with the convenient distraction Fred afforded her. "So, Fred- are you hooked into the net?"

"Of course." He replied, watching intently as she carefully sorted through the remains.

"Check my e-mail, will you?" She asked, as she found what she had been looking for. "Ah! Part 57436.357. Way to name things for easy access, Boy Genius." she mumbled, finding comfort in anger.

"I am linked to the server- I am now entering your password."

"Okay-" Cindy mumbled once more, before looking up in surprise. "Hey! How do you know my e-mail address- and my _password_?"

Fred shifted uncomfortably.

"Frrrrred?" She asked, menacingly.

"Well, normally that is classified information, but if you must know, I was made with innate hacking abilities. I was programmed to be able to access any computer."

"Jimmy taught you how to be a hacker?" She asked, amazed.

"In a word, yes. It came to be very useful from time to time."

"Such as?" Cindy asked, taking the moment to wipe a bit of grease from her arm.

"Accessing lab footage 37854.674.35b4."

Cindy raised an eyebrow, but returned to her delicate work in wait.

"Computer!"

His voice shook her from her work- she dropped the piece of metal, twisting to the sound. Following Fred's holographic gaze, she tuned her eyes to the main computer screen, where Jimmy sat before them.

"We need to get that access code!" He cried, typing madly.

Cindy, shaken though she was, was able to guess at his age as he franticly looked from page to page of text before him, as the camera shifted to follow his actions. Her guess was affirmed as Fred paused the tape, Jimmy reaching for yet another button.

"4 years ago, June the 7th."

"He was thirteen."

"Correct. Having crippled the computer systems of NASA, a villainous person had hacked into the main core and started taking over the systems- starting with the missile guidance systems."

"I remember that- didn't Jimmy get a medal from the president?"

Fred nodded. "Yes. Jimmy used my prototype core model to access the hacker's own computer- although he ended up only being able to buy time."

"Mmm." She nodded, closing her eyes to hear once more the remainder of the story.

"Then, using his recently finished advanced tracing system, he finally found where the scoundrel had been hiding out- in a shack in southern Nevada. It wasn't easy-"

"Nothing ever was, when you're dealing with Jimmy Neutron." She said, nostalgia creeping over her like the cold hands of a ghostly past. "But he saved the world, again. Thanks to his computer, no less."

"That is true in a sense. However, a computer is only as smart as is programmed to be. But, in any case, yes. He most certainly saved the world- starting with Newark, the first intended target."

She nodded. For a moment, she soaked in the silence, ignoring the admonitions from her brain to return to work.

"Miss Vortex?" Fred asked.

"Yes?" She returned, eyes remaining closed.

"You have mail."

She sighed, intending an refreshing breath, but it did little to soothe her memories. "Okay." she finally assented, grasping a tool and starting on her work again, "Read to me, Fred- who from?"

"LibsterbopUltra23-"

"Libby. next?"

"hmfomt2562"

"Karen. Skip."

"2526245nsgx469dvs.etr"

"What?" Cindy asked, raising her head to voice her confusion.

"I said 2526-"

"No, no-" Cindy interrupted, dusting off her hands and turning to face him. "I heard you."

"Then why did you request a repetition?"

"I didn't-" She paused, searching for an explanation suitable for educating the artificial life form. "Sometimes when humans are confused, we say 'what'."

"Ah, yes. Then, how shall I answer?"

"Just...I don't know." She admitted. "Sometimes, Fred, _I _don't understand why humans do things. Let me see that address."

Pulling herself into the chair before the keyboard, she gazed up at the screen. Sure enough, the pervasive address loomed above her- unfamiliar numbers and letters taunting.

"This doesn't make sense." She unarticulated, not low enough.

"May I help clarify something, Miss Vortex?"

"Well, it's just that I haven't gotten Spam since-" She stopped herself short, as the flood of memories washed away the present.

Present.

The word twisted and turned in her mind, and like so many English words, its double meaning shook her. "When I was 14-" She said, talking more to herself than to the holographic personage beside her, "He fixed my computer for me. When I got it back, of course, he had tweaked it out with all sorts of extra prototype programs- like 'Spam B Gone 4.6'. Funny thing is- I never asked him to fix it in the first place."

Fred listened silently as she continued, held in the trance of her nostalgia.

"I had been complaining at school about how my computer had crashed- I was going to throw it out, and he asked if he could have it." She attempted to swallow the lump in her throat, and failed. "I said sure, as long as it was broken, he couldn't possibly make it worse, like he usually did."

Fred tilted his head.

Cindy nodded at him, smile upon her face that was sadder than any frown. "I know: I was a real jerk to him when he was-" She stopped, unable to direct her tongue with the worsening blur in her eyes.

Finally, she spoke once more, not bothering to wipe her eyes, instead, blinking them shut. "Anyway, two days later, I went to walk outside, and there, on my doorstep, was my computer, with a note: "Try Me". So, I hauled it up to my room- it worked like a charm." She smiled, lighter now. "Every time I booted it up- there was that goofy Neutron symbol he had to plaster all over everything."

She lost control now, and returned again to the place in which she had become accustomed- the tears fell down as she held her hands to her face.

"I haven't been able to turn it on- since he-" Her voice broke over the words, "since he-"

But she was unable to finish. The fleeting thought crossed her mind- _"the pain is too much."_ But there was no one to ease it, no one to notice the nineteen year-old non-genius lab intruder, twisted in pain that came from her heart- but a flickering hologram. _"And a hologram," _she reminded her subconscious, _"can't hold you. It can't…" _she thought now, pulling the hair from before her eyes in resignation, _"raise the dead."

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**AN:** AWWW... (ahem) okay, clue time!

One of the reveiwers said they didn't have a decoder ring...but I'll bet you do! The object you need to crack the code is a common household object.

Go back to the last chapter and reveiw the clues at the end, and think...common household object...numbers...rings abell...

Come on, guys! I know you can do it!

Peace out till next chap.


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: **I'm back! I know, I know, I take to long, haha! Sory! I'm doing my best, but I have a lot on my plate right now. In fact, I would truly appreciate if you could take a look at my **other stories** as well! Just _click my name _to see my work- it only takes a few minutes, and I'm sure I'll have something you'll like. (Am I shamelessly advertising my other stories? Of course I am!)

Anyway, this chapter gives us a little more plot twist...I hope you like it- I'm hoping to get the next chapter out soon.

**Reviewers: **

**Snowboarder9; heartsyhawk: **Yay! I knew you guys could do it! Glad you liked!  
**Mysticofthepen:** I'm glad you like it, even if you don't like angst. That tell me a lot about my writing, and I really appreciate it. Don't worry, there is more to the plotline than angst, though!  
**Retroville9; Spuffyshipper; Victoria; kingdom219; rikagirls:** Thank you!  
**romancejunkie:** Fluff rehab: the first step is admitting you have a problem. Lol, I'm glad you like it!  
**Dannyphantomsgf and DarkDannysgf:** "…It ain't baloney, it ain't a pony!…"  
**Badwolf1; And FOREVER:** Another clue awaits at the bottom of the page.  
**acosta pérez josé ramiro: **Good guess, but no dice: try again! By the way, I'm planning on reading your fics very soon…I just need a free moment…

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**Chapter 8  
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"In any event, Miss Vortex," Fred said, "It seems as though this e-mail has gotten through your Spam blocking device. Shall I delete it?"

Cindy breathed in heavily, eyes closed. "Is there any way you can figure out who it's from?"

"I can try, Miss Vortex, to hack into the main servers and compute as much."

"Go for it. It'll keep you occupied."

"Accessing…"

Cindy turned the bolt in front of her, watching the wrench go back and forth. The metal squeaked and squealed with each movement, and, had she been in a whimsical mood, she might have imagined it a tune. But, of course, she was rarely whimsical anymore. _"He was all that was keeping me sane," _She thought to herself now, unable to deny herself the sensation of her memories. _"When Dad left…" _She reminisced now, twisting and turning the memories to suit her mood, like the wrench in her hand. The bolt tightened, and she turned her head to the instructions once more.

Releasing an audible sigh, she rubbed her forehead for a moment. _"I need to try something different. What's this part?"_ She asked herself, picking up a random part from the table. _"It looks like a hard drive…can it really be that easy?"_ She asked once more, rolling her eyes as she flipped pages of data. _"Huh."_ She answered herself. _"I guess it is."_ Scrolling down the list of information with her finger, she fingered the hard drive with the other hand. _"He can't call it a hard drive, of course," _She said with impudence, as she held 'Drive17alpha8' in her hand, _"But it's the same idea."_

She held it up before her. "In this little chunk of metal…" She said, whispering now, "is Goddard's memory." She examined the outer casing, carefully going over every inch. It was burned black, with only glints of silver beneath the crusted surface to belie the original state.  
She set it down on the table, reaching for a small screwdriver. Carefully working at the screws, she maneuvered the outer casing to fit her needs.

Within a few moments, it was removed. She glanced back at the instructions. "Okay. So." She said, reviewing, sorting in her mind. "The carapace is off. Now I have to find the…" Allowing her unheard voice to trail off, she looked once more at her quarry.

"Miss Vortex?" The hesitant voice of Fred interrupted her thoughts once more.

"Yes?"

"I've…I've done what I can…but…"

She paused now, turning to him. "But, what?"

He tilted his holographic head. "Well, the signal is not from Earth."

She stood. "What do you mean, 'not from Earth'?"

"Just that, Miss Vortex. The source code does not match. Not only is it brilliantly encrypted, it is issuing from, I estimate, 46 light-years away."

"But…that's far beyond our Solar System!"

"That is correct."

"How…how can you even detect that?"

He raised his nose a bit. "Do you not understand the concept of signal jumping? It is a simple matter of identifying the nearest possible signal emission. Just as you would, for example, trace a letter by its post office of origin."

"But in order to do that, you would have to be aware of specific signal locations."

"Yes, that is correct."

Cindy's mouth hung slightly open for a moment, as she considered what Fred had said.

"Surely you are aware the fact that there is alien life?" Fred asked, curious tilt to his tone.

"Of course-" Cindy managed. "I mean, I was there for the Yolkian attack, you know. And other times…" She reflected on the memories now, letting her mind slip her back into nostalgia. Good, bad, strange and powerful moments spent with her friends, and enemies, in space. From King Gooblat to April the Gorlock, she had had the chance to see far beyond, above, and beneath the plane of her own existence. "And I owe it to him…" She knew. "I owe everything to him."

"Then-" Fred continued, disrupting her thought process, "surely it is not inconceivable that I, too, am aware of various extra-terrestrial technologies. Why, I have been programmed with the ability to interpret, send, and receive the inter-systemary equivalent of e-mail."

"Oh." Cindy acknowledged. "Then, I suppose…I suppose Jimmy and April talked to each other a lot." She allowed the words to pass by her lips, feeling suddenly tired.

"You refer to the Gorlock, April, I assume? Yes, from time to time. However, when it became necessary for her to travel beyond my technological reach to forty her people's protectorate planets, they lost contact."

"Oh. Then, you have a distance limit?"

"Of course. The universe is a vast place, and in order to contact the far reaches of it, I would have to be manually programmed with specific addresses, as it were. My creator was in the process of doing so."

"I…I see." She turned back to the table before her once more, feeling the flipping pages of the manual between her fingers.

"So, then. What shall I do with the message?"

She kneaded her shoulder for a moment, feeling the muscles ripple under her grasp. "I don't know. Can you isolate it?"

"Yes. I am capable of file quarantine."

"Then lock it up. I'll figure it out later."

"Yes, Miss Vortex."

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Clue time! Okay, for all yous peoples: The household object you're looking for was used in more than one Jimmy Neutron episode...remember when Jimmy and Cindy switched bodies? Of course you do. At the moment of brian transfer, what object were they both using?  



	9. Chapter 9

**AN: **Wow! It's been a while, huh? It's been really busy for me lately, and my JN spark kinda faded for a while- but fear not- I'll always come back. I really hope you like this chapter- we're getting closer to an actual plotline. I'm sorry if it's kind of moving slow, I'm really trying to pace this one. Well, don't forget to reveiw!

**no, i don't have monkey pants: **Thanks, lol!  
**dannyphantomsgf; badwolf1; kingdom219; snowboarder9; And FOREVER: **That's right! Look at the AN at the end for yet another clue.  
**Spuffyshipper: **Wow, risking trouble with the 'rents to read my fics? What a compliment, lol!  
**acosta perez jose ramiro: **Thats...actually a really good idea! But, sadly, I must stick to the plotline...  
**heartsyhawk: **Here you go! Glad you liked the e-mail and jelousy parts...it was fun writing it.  
**mysticofthepen; pokey :** Oh, you're gonna **_so _**love this fic more, just wait! BWA-HA-HA!  
**sammy girl99: **Thank you!

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_Disclaimer: "What do you do when the only one that can make you stop crying is the person who made you cry?"- Unknown _

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****Chapter 9**

The hours ticked away, time sucking away her energy, and the project sucking away her thoughts. As the clock ticked away the seconds, minutes, and hours, her mind ticked away the past, the memories of 'then'. 

She locked yet another piece of the puzzle into place as the clock signaled midnight. She gazed down now, wiping her hands for the billionth time on a rag that showed the wear. Fingering the rag, she sat back in her chair, looking at the outline of her restoration.

"Well, it's starting to look better." She allowed herself to acknowledge. She rubbed her raw hands. "I've had just about enough of turning wrenches." She picked up the component she sought, and held it up to the light. "Let's see what we can do with this. Fred?"

"Yes, Miss Vortex?"

"Fred," Cindy said, keeping her eyes on her quarry, "Is there a computer system in the lab that is not directly linked to the main computer?"

"I do not see how that would be relevant. What is it you wish to accomplish?"

"I'm wondering if it would be safe to hook this into the main computer." She explained, nodding toward the object in her hands. "I was hoping maybe there was an external system."

"I see. Unfortunately, Miss Vortex, there is not a truly independent system. As a matter of fact, I am one of the running systems serving as a link. However, I may be able to siphon off one terminal. Give me a moment."

"Sure." She took another sip from her coffee.

"I have succeeded in isolating a terminal using advanced firewall and-"

"I don't need the details, Fred. Just point the way."

Fred did so, and Cindy took a seat before the small screen.

"Okay. Let's link up." Cindy mumbled to herself, as she looked around the screen at the many adaptors and slots. She picked up several, searching for the right one. "Here we go."

The screen lit up in a series of numbers and letters. Cindy sighed.

"Of course. It has to be in techno babble."

"May I assist you, Miss Vortex?"

"Looks like you have to, Fred. Can you sort this into something understandable?"

He pause for a moment, calculating. "I can, but it will take time. The hard drive was badly damaged in the accident. If I may make a suggestion, Miss Vortex?" He asked her now, carefully.

"Yeah?"

He paused a moment before finishing. "This may be a good opportunity to rest, Miss Vortex."

She closed her mouth against the arguments that came, considering his words. "I…I am kind of tired." She said, watching the synthesized relief on his holographic face. "Keep up the work, Fred, and I'll go catch a few winks. Wake me up when you get something."

"That I shall do."

With that, Cindy left the computer to his work and returned to her cot. As she lay there, she hard the noises of the lab- it seemed to live and breathe around her.

_"What now?" _She thought, after a time. _"What is my life now? I'll spend time, maybe days or weeks, if I'm lucky, fixing Goddard- distracting myself. But, when it comes down to it…who am I? Where am I going? …without him…"_

He allowed her mind to drift as minds often do on the brink of dreams.

_"I'm not even sure I **want** to repair Goddard." _She admitted to herself, finding the dark room she occupied a honesty-promoting channel of thought. _"What if…"_ She thought now, allowing her body to pull upward into a sitting position, "_What if he has footage of the crash?"_ With the words set free in her mind, her fears were voiced, and once more the tears gathered around her lashes like light from the sunrise. _"Can I really watch his last moments?" _She asked herself, in between sobs that, whether inward or outward, she could not tell._ "Can I really stand to hear his last words?"_ She attempted to blink her tears back as strands of hair fell before her eyes. In days past, this would have annoyed her, causing her to brush them away with irritation; but her hands remained over her heart- the seat of her pain. _"I've spent my life trying to prove that I was strong. That I was untouchable- I didn't need anybody. But I'm not strong enough to deal with this…with him being gone."_

And as she lay her head back down, giving in to the bags beneath her eyes as her mind slipped into sleep, one more thought escaped her lips, in a whisper barely heard by the no one there.

_"I'm not strong enough to say goodbye…"_

_

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_

"Miss Vortex?" The voice called, drawing her away from her pleasant dream. "…Cindy?" He asked once more, until she fully roused herself from dreamland.

"uh…" She mumbled, drawing her body upwards. "I'm up. What is it, Fred?"

"Miss Vortex," Fred said now, worried overtone calling her senses out of the fog. "I have repaired what I can."

"Okay."

"It seems there is excessive damage to the hard drive's memory core, but I was able to salvage 2.455 of it."

"Only 2.455?" She asked, discouragement threatening her.

"It is still a substantial amount. Goddard's hard drive is capable of one yottabit storage capacity."

"Yattabit?" She asked, as she stood from her cot. "That's a…good thing, then?"

"Unequivocally. A yottabit is 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 bits, whereas the typical PC drive would be only a diminutive fraction of-"

"Okay, I get it. Its is still a good amount of information, then."

"Yes. Unfortunantly…"

"...What?"

He glanced at her once more, apologetic look plaguing his face. "The memory I have been able to restore is spotty. Instead of book, as it were, there are pages here and there."

"Oh."

"But there are several pages I have strung together, allowing for a smoother viewing. Most of the memory I was able to restore is in the text form- I have a few audio and video bits…" His voice trailed of as he followed her from her cot to the next room. As the sliding door closed behind her, she yawned.

But his words caught her next breath by surprise.

"Miss Vortex…I was able to salvage some footage…of the crash."

Her heart, the seemingly sole remaining function in her body, beat harder in her chest. The only thing dryer then her mouth were her lips as she managed to speak again, failing without caring.

Fred's voice was gentle, caring as a computer could be. "Shall I-" He allowed the question to remain unanswered, knowing it had been said without words.

She fought back the tears knocking at her eyes, and tried to breathe again.

"I…I think..."

The pause in which the last word sat was a heavy one, and as Fred waited with a worried look, she fought the hardest battle she had ever endured- with herself. _"How can I do this?" _She asked herself, trying to imagine what it might be like to see him take what proved to be his last breaths. _"How can I not?" _She reminded herself, knowing the pain of an open wound. She tried to consider the future- would this help her say goodbye? In any case, she opened her mouth to speak- but the beating of her heart drowned out the words that came.

"I think I need to see it."

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**AN:** Whew, heavy stuff. Well, kiddies, here's a hint...surely, you must be catching on soon! Now that you know the decoding tool, use it! The numbers I gave, when used with the object I hinted at, should produce a word...Let me know if you got it! 

Till next chap, happy readin!

**P.S:** I've made a JN music video! If you would like the link, message me- or if you prefer, go to **youtube** dot com, and search for "Looking Through Patient Eyes". Don't forget to leave me a comment!


	10. Chapter 10

**AN:** Hi everybody! I'm actually quite pleasantly surprised I was able to update so fast- I hope you like this chapter!

**Reviewers: **

**romancejunkie: **Thank you so much! I'll send you the link to the music vid soon as I can...

**mysticofthepen: **Wow! I guess I better update before y'all die of anticipation, lol!

**howrude2u; And FOREVER; pokey:** Thank you!

**Readrbug21: **Yes, I've noticed the same thing. The more I read and write, the more I've been improving, and it means that each chapter is a bit different. Hopefully this will continue to be a good thing!

**heartsyhawk: **THANK YOU! I'm so excited that people are seeing my video- it was my first try, so I love to get feedback on it. I'm glad you like the fic, too- here's your update!

**acosta perez jose ramiro: **Thank you very much! I'm a little worried this chapter doesn't touch as deep on her thoughts/emotions, but I hope it works out anyway.

**badwolf1: **Glad to hear it! Thanks!

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**Note: **There will be another hint toward the code at the end as usual, but this time it is a bit of the big-giveaway type, so if you really want to figure it out on your own, I suggest not reading it, lol...don't forget to reveiw!  
**

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_**Disclaimer: **"Numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it."- Joanne Kathleen Rowling

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**Chapter 10**

She sat on the chair, before the computer screen that loomed above and beyond her thoughts. Time slowed to half of the time it took for her heart to beat in rapid secession.

"The clips are in indefinite order, Miss Vortex, but I shall try to approximate the source code."

"What?" She asked, having neither heard or understood his warning.

"It is," He continued, having learned the value of illustrating his point, "as if I am grabbing at passing clips, Miss Vortex. I will aim my best, but it may take several sessions of trial and error."

"Sure." She confirmed, trying to steady her breathing and focus her thoughts. But her thoughts, as usual, would not obey.

_"What will it be like?"_ She couldn't help but ask herself- but the future was as blurry as her tear-stained vision.

Suddenly, her thoughts were interrupted as a voice pulled her to the screen.

"Goddard," He said, as she watched the young boy pulling on the rope in his hands. "Give that back!" The sounds of his laughter filled the spaces between the moments of pain. "You crazy dog!" With another laugh, he finally tore free his quarry.

"Fast forward search enabled. Commencing."

She watched in silence at the years flew by. Twelve- seven- fifteen- the ages passed before her at lightning speed, out of order and out of sync; but embedded in her memory as quickly as they came. She wiped away the tears at her eyes, waiting constantly for the next clip- the next visage of the past.

And as she watched the memories she had forgotten play out on the screen, she slowly felt the numbness rising and falling inside her. Hardly noticing, she raised her hand to cover her chest- over the organ that beat now in time with the clips, intertwining with the motions onscreen.

A clip, passing rapidly in procession, caught up her own memory in a replay of a time and place. _"I remember-"_ she thought, as she began to laugh. _"When we-"_

But the laugh caught in her throat. With wide eyes, she realized what she had done.

_"How could I laugh? How could I? I'm waiting to see Jimmy die! How dare I-"_ But she couldn't so sternly accuse her own heart- the heart that had confused and hurt her, strengthened and grown with her… it was too much like him.

Suddenly, an explosion rocked her from her thoughts.

"There it is." Fred mumbled. "Extracting. Rewinding."

She tensed as Fred worked, counting the lifetimes in between the moments.

"I believe I have it."

And with his words, the clip began to play.

_(**AN: **Don't forget: This is a recording in Goddard's hard drive, so whatever Cindy sees is from his point of view- and she can't really see Goddard.)_

"Monitoring all levels," Jimmy said, flipping a switch before him. "Switching to Earth audio frequency. Yep, Goddard, it's a beautiful day!"

"Bark, bark!" Goddard said in reply.

"Four hours to touch down. We're gonna make it just in time for 'Advanced Physics Theatre'!" Jimmy exclaimed, putting his hands behind his head in relaxation.

"Bark!"

Cindy's eyes followed the movements on the screen, her ears working in collaboration- but her head was busy with thoughts. They pulled her in all directions, opposite of logic and beyond emotion.

The clip played on.

"Hey, Goddard, any Subspace 17 e-mail yet?"

"Barr.."

"It's been almost 18 hours- you'd think it would be completely encrypted and accepted by now."

"Bark!"

"Well, that's Kyrok for you- always late." Jimmy rubbed his eyes as Goddard watched on. "Well, soon it'll be set up, and I'll improve the subspace level e-mail by around 23 percent!"

"Bark!" Goddard said, opening his screen.

"Okay, 23.636 percent- close enough." He said, with a laugh. "I just wish the coding didn't have to be so dirty- my point system is cleaner and less confusing. Too much unnecessary binary. A 3.46345AhgR system is so much more efficient, but…aliens are so temperamental…not to mention smelly. Goddard, I still can't figure out a logical hypothesis as to why the greater majority of the Alien species we encounter smell so bad! "

"Bark." Goddard replied.

A blinking light caught Cindy's gaze a moment before Jimmy's.

"Hello- what's this?" He reached for the control-

Suddenly, there was an explosion, and the screen flashed with flames and white noise.

She heard Goddard bark as the camera came back into hazy view- and out again. Her hands unconsciously grasped at the chair beneath her, pulling her toward the screen. In clips of seconds at a time, she was able to make out finally the seat in which Jimmy sat, the floor of the rocket, and what appeared to be Jimmy's hand- but the screen continued to fade in and out as Cindy turned to Fred.

"The clips are becoming fragmented, Miss Vortex," He said in answer to her unasked question. "What you are seeing is probably seconds or perhaps even minutes apart."

She twisted back to the screen just as it turned black.

The darkness of the screen opened the channel within her- she was able, at last, to cry once again.

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**AN:** Okay, gang, here we go: 

Remember, The code was 2/3 4/3 6/2 3/1 9/3  
Also, the decoding object was...a telephone!

So, then, you have to use a telephone with the numbers. here is a start: the the first number in each set refers to a button on the phone! For example, the first set is 2/3, so the 2 refers to the second button on the number pad! Now, you have to figure out what the second number in each set is for!

Happy decoding!  
-RR

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	11. Chapter 11

**AN:**

_Wow_, it has been a long time. Have you given up on me, guys? I promise you, I _will_ finish this fic, so please be patient! I wanted to wait to post this chapter, as I may have to edit it a bit more as the next chapter unfolds, but I simply couldn't keep you wating any longer.

**To all those who waited so patiently, thank you- you are my inspiration and my reason for writing.** **Misc:**

Please see the end of the fic for some "feedback" feedback and other info. _Please_ don't forget to leave a constructive, humorous, kind, or really, any other kind of comment.

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**Chapter 11**

Time.

For centuries, man had pondered about, invented under, and co-existed with this elusive entity.

Now as she sat in the glow of the screen in front of her, Cynthia Vortex could do nothing about the time that past by her- however fast it was moving, it continued to move, paying no attention to the droop of her shoulders or the strands of hair jutting out from her head. It paid no mind to the incremental movement of her body, back and forth: rocking softly between pain and numbness. It did not heed the tears that were beginning to dry, untouched and unfettered, and it certainly did not halt for the thoughts her mind could finally attempt.

Still, it felt to her as if all the world was stopped- halted in her mind by the feelings that gripped her now. Why else did the moments passing by seem like hours?

He stood over her, waiting, as only a person or computer in servitude could, awaiting an order or plea- whatever she may need.

But this was not enough to stir her from her thoughts. She had watched him die- and as helpless as she was to bring him back, she was just as helplessly lost to the images of his demise, playing over again in her mind.

Her mind- it whirred and clicked, fueled by pain, gaining speed, but no clarity, with every thought. _"I watched him die."_ This basic thought, basic truth, stung her again as she said it to herself. She could not compute more than this, and so she repeated it, willing the reflection to finally settle in her mind. _"I watched him die."_ Every breath she was taking felt somehow foreign, and all at once, she realized she felt a stranger within her own body. _"I watched him die." _She said once more, and this time, the echo of the sentence in her brain opened the floodgates of thought within her.

She leapt from her seat, surprising Fred. With her eyes strangely fixated on nothing in particular, she grabbed the wrench she found below her hands and began to tighten its grip upon a nut. _"I watched him die." _ She replicated, with every turn of the wrench. _"I watched him die." _One more turn of the wrench. _"I watched his last laugh."_ Again she turned it. _"I watched his last words."_ Again. _"I watched the explosion that killed him."_ Again the nut went around, and the frankness of her words did nothing to aid the clarity of her thoughts. Without meaning to, she continued to herself out loud, each sentence echoing the movement of her hands. _"I watched his last breath."_

Suddenly, the wrench slipped from her hands.

She didn't notice.

"Why?" She asked, not moving her eyes from the fixation that griped them.

"Miss Vortex?" Fred asked, a statement in confusion, rather than a question.

**_"Why?!?" _**She screamed, turning in rage toward him. **"Why _Jimmy_?!? Why?!?"**

"I do not understand, Miss Vortex."

She didn't notice the tears forming at her eyes- they had become as familiar as breathing to her now. "All of my life" she said, closing her eyes, finally, against the pain of past and future, "he was the hero. He was the one who saved the world…."

Fred waited, transferring her words to some unknown data base as she wept silently for the words that came.

"Why did he have to die? Why couldn't…why couldn't I have saved him?"

"Saved him?" Fred asked, encouraging further elaboration.

She tried to open her eyes to him once again, but the blurry form before her held no answers. She shut them once more. "All those times he saved my life…why wasn't I there this one time? This one time?!"

Fred continued to watch her, intrigued in some vague way by the logic of the human mind.

Finally, she was able to look at him once more. The anger for herself, for the moment, burned in her eyes with her words. "I know there was nothing I could have done…but at least I could have died with him."

Fred, shocked slightly by this morbid thought, took pause. He watched her as she drew in a breath, turning from the spot in which she stood.

She walked away without a word, toward the cot she had become accustomed to.

Fred, about to resign himself to rest mode, turned after her with a final thought: his computer mind obligated to correct and adjust, the words came automatically calling after her.

"You would not have died."

She stopped, unsure of the meaning of his words, and only slightly less unsure she cared. "What?" She asked softly, not turning from her spot.

"You would not have died, Miss Vortex. You could have engaged the parachutes."

She fell silent, and in the moment that followed, the words that fell from his so-called mouth reached her stomach with a sickening thud.

"Or the anti-matter floatation device. Or the auto-correctional guidance system. Or the crash field generator."

As the words multiplied, her nausea grew, culminating in the words that vomited from her mouth. "I could have saved him-" she whispered, trying to hold back the vertigo from encasing her body. "I could have-"

Suddenly, a thought hit her- slapped her- its' sting resonating in her soul.

Had she been in a contemplative mood, she might have pondered this realization- that a thought, a single, unremarkable thought could resonate from her mind downward- traveling the winding staircase of her spine until it has coursed every circuit within her body.

But the thought in itself was all that consumed her.

"Why-" she started, afraid to continue, for the question itself was too strong a taste for her mouth, and the answer, perhaps, more than she could stand to think. Again she tried. "Why didn't they work?"

"What do you mean?"

"Why didn't they _work_?" She asked again, unable to shift her mind beyond this single resonating thought. "Why didn't they _work_, Fred?"

"Miss Vortex, you are not being clear in-"

"Why didn't they **_work_**?" She asked again, pacing toward him with a finality that might have frightened a creature capable of such emotion. Reaching him, she leaned forcefully toward him, and, had he been capable of touch, he would have felt her warm breath upon what might have been his skin as she continued. _"Why_? If he had all these things to save him, why didn't they **_work_**?"

The final word hung in the balance of the moment, suspended by the anger resonating from her.

Fred, obviously confused by her question, tilted his head at her word before answering. "There is nothing to indicate, Miss Vortex, that they were not operational."

She shook her head in anger. "Of course they weren't! If they were, he would…" She stopped just in time to catch the hiccup of a sob at her last words. "…he would be alive." She finished at last.

Once again there was silence, waiting patiently for a word to come forth. She was shaking, although, from anger or grief, Fred did not know.

"Fred," She spoke at last, freeing the dawning realization that was too explosive to contain- "Something is wrong here. This was not an accident- it couldn't be." Her words drifted forth, softness echoing the blazing anger looming within her.

"Certainly not." Fred said, and the certainty of his words ran down her spine, an ice-cold sensation.

She turned to him again, question written obviously upon her face- but upon Fred's face, there lay a perfect picture of pure confusion.

"What do you mean?" She asked, carefully weighing her words against his face.

"Why, Miss Vortex, why do you think I suggested that _you_ would have to engage an emergency system?"

Seeing the look of confusion growing on her face, he continued.

"Did you not notice? The clips from the crash indicated several minutes of clip intervals all showing no movement from James' body. I am therefore operating under the assumption that he became unconscious just before the fall."

"….unconscious." She repeated.

"Well, yes. Please, allow me to show you."

As the screen flashed once more with clips, silent this time, the meaning of his words attempted to pierce her mind, to infiltrate her thoughts.

_"…unconscious."_ She thought once more, weighing the implications within her. "But that makes no sense! How can you be sure?" She asked, senses frayed and broken as the words tumbled out.

"As you can see," Fred narrated, as the ghastly clips again played out before her, "the clips are fragmented." The picture froze suddenly, and the grim outline of Jimmy's torso and hand, resting upon the seat, filled the screen. The ship's controls loomed over the overcast sky, metallic glare reflecting from them.

"Observe the sky." Fred encouraged, as he re-wound the tape once more. "Can you see the outline of the sun behind the clouds?"

Managing to nod in approval, she concentrated upon the orb.

"Freeze-frame fast-forward mode indicates" He continued, as the screen flashed in obedience to his words, "the passing of too significant a time to be inconsequential. Do you see how the movement of the ship-"

"-In relation to the sun is wrong- I see it." She said, strangling the words from her body, wrestling some kind of sense from the emotional baggage weighing her thoughts down. And then- she ground to a halt.

This was the moment.

Her mind, at last, twisted and conformed- reaching out to find the point of construction. The moments- the hours- spent in calculation and reason, in logic and paradox- everything she had, and had been- it came to this one moment. The spinning vortex of her life, wild with emotion and fear and sadness, stormed over her consciousness with a rage- and finally, finally, the eye of the storm settled over her weary mind.

Suddenly, everything was so _perfectly_ clear. Seeing as with newly opened eyes, she sat in the chair before the computer.

"If the data had simply indicated that James was unconscious during the fall, I would have, of course, contributed the lack of safety system discharge to his having been struck by an object during the explosion we witnessed. But-"

"But the tape is _wrong_."

"In a sense, yes."

"In every sense." She said robotically. She felt the sadness within her- the voice that had been screaming pain for the lifetime she had begun since his death- now turn into a sinister burning. Her mouth filled with the bitter taste of anger, her eyes flashed upon the screen as if to reach out and destroy the object of her hatred.

Sadness was secondary, and it bent and subjected itself to the commanding call of her rage.

"The tape was doctored." She spit out. "I don't know how I could have missed it before- look! In this clip here," She said, fingers flying over the keys as her mind flew toward the answer, "the sun is at, what, six o'clock position?"

His emotionless eyes watched the screen in response.

"Look- there- the next second, it's at an eight, maybe, eight-thirty dip!"

"Yes. Not even the lapses in time between the clips account for that kind of a difference, Miss Vortex."

"How is this possible, Fred? We're watching the footage taken straight from Goddard's hard drive- I took it out of him myself. There wouldn't have been enough time to manufacture a video in between the crash and when they found…the…body. Someone would have had to plan- to...to..."

The realization came to her fast and hard, and the boiling rage in her expelled it like so much vomit from her mouth. "So. This wasn't an accident- it was a _murder_."

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**After-note:**

**MidnightSuburbia**; **ccs4ever**; **mysticofthepen**: Thank you so much- your proddings, encouragement, and yes, even your death threats were the key to my inspiration.

**Zergplex:** You know, I did think that more people would get it faster, but I guess it was like 40 percent of readers got it right away. In any case, congrats for the puzzle-solving skills!

**Spuffyshipper**: you would think so, but actually, I think for me it's more of an outlet for all the angst I can muster- my stories absorb my negitive emotions like a sponge. Thank you for the comment!

**acosta perez jose ramiro**: You are a constant source of inspiration and encouragment. Thank you.

**WereWolve'sGang; Dannyphantomsgf and DarkDannysgf; badwolf1; pokey**: Thank you for the lovely comments!

**Knight of Caeli; And FOREVER:** Congrats! You decoded the...um...code! .;

**heartsyhawk:** "It seems like it was just out of thin air that the malfunction started. Poor Cindy." To spawn a Yoda quote: "As they seem, not all things are." Stay tuned, and thank you for your comment.

**And now, the question on everyone's mind: _So, just where have you been?_**

Erm, yes...so sorry for disappearing! As I've said before, I'm the type of writer who tends to write in spurts, then disappear into the depths of nothingness until my creative side gets too smothered and needs an outlet. I will _always_ return- until the end, I will _always_ come back- to, hopefully, take you on this crazy roller coaster- into the blackness of space, and down into the depths of the entwined hearts of these so-called 'star-crossed lovers'.

Now, if that wasn't an over-dramatic foreshadow, I don't know what is.

Anyway, I can't say thank you enough to those who have stuck it out and come back to the story- and also to those who may be discovering it for the first time.

Ladies and gents, I'm back.

Your faithful writer,

-Roseredd

(Also found at roseredd dot deviant art dot com, with no spaces, of course) 


	12. Chapter 12

**AN: **As my writing style evolves, the story winds deeper into the plot. From this chapter out, there will be more action, more mystery, and more twists. Are you ready?

(Notes/thank you's at the end)

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**Chapter 12**

Expecting an outraged explosion, Fred stared in mild surprise at the being before him. Eyes closed, perfectly still- she breathed in and out with steady motion.

"_I still remember that doll." _

Perfectly painted smile upon its china face, it had graced her dresser since her birth- a gift from some distant relative. The lace that intertwined down the bodice -splashing onto the white bowl of the gown- had been an object of many a far-lost daydream. From the pearls, to the tiny shoes, to the wisps of blonde hair, curling upward past the green eyes- she was the perfect bride.

"…_my dream…"_

She wasn't sure when that dream had turned into a nightmare. Somewhere between the fantasies of true love and princes on white horses, somewhere along the line it had died out. Where was that doll now, anyway? The broken shards of white porcelain? The haze of time had misted away all but the sound- ah- the sound she remembered all too well. Exploding china- shattered dreams, crashing out to cover her floor…or…maybe she did remember. Yes- the lessons. The karate lessons her mother had granted her.

She remembered the rage boiling within her…

"_the lessons…."_

The discussion….from somewhere in time, it reached out to her…

"…_a healthy outlet"_

"…_just don't know, dear…bit of a problem with self control as it is-"_

"_Ridiculous!! …getting her those lessons, end of discussion…"_

_The rage had to go somewhere. The pain and listlessness…the feelings of rejection…they had to…._

She lifted her eyes toward the screen.

"_the doll…broken…"_

The lessons had saved her- killed her. Kept her rage stuffed down inside- for a time. She had been taught control- to channel and focus rage into movement. She called upon that strength now. Fred watched silently as the rage became a glow inside her- enveloping in some imaginarily real way her body and mind.

Her eyes lifted to the screen.

_Focus._

"He was on an interplanetary mission. Who wanted him dead?"

_Focus._

"He had many enemies, Miss Vortex."

_Focus._

"It was planned. Executed almost perfectly. The ship was sabotaged, Jimmy murdered, Goddard damaged. But how? In what order?"

_Focus. _

"Well…" Fred began…but soon drew his thought to a close. She was not listening to him anymore. She was self contained, withdrawn into herself….in some way, a form of thought he had seen so many times in his former owner. He stepped back out of her vision, knowing his place. He was not needed right now.

_Focus. _

"Why plan it to appear to be an accident? Most of his enemies would have gladly taken the glory…" Her voice drifted slowly into inward thought without notice. _"He was setting up intergalaxy mail systems. Who would have wanted to prevent that?" _

Deciding to attend to other thing while she was otherwise engaged, Fred turned his attention to monitoring the inner systems of the lab. Disappearing into his invisible sanctuary of computer thought, his mind went blazing through the circuits, his eyes through the cameras, his figurative fingers caressing every inch of the building with care.

"Miss Vortex…" rang out the voice, from every speaker. She ignored the voice, tunneling deep within herself to search out the answers she knew she would have to somehow find within.

_Focus. _

"Miss Vortex, there is an emergency!" The ringing out of his alarmed voice seemed to shake her for a moment…but her eyes remained unchanged.

_Focus. _

"MISS VORTEX!"

Her thoughts dislodged, she shook her mind clear to look upon the worried face of her strange partner.

"What- what's the matter?"

"The e-mail you received earlier- it's…growing!"

"Growing? How can an e-mail grow?"

"I am at a lack of words to otherwise explain it, Miss Vortex. That is precisely what it is doing. The numerical equation found within is multiplying itself!"

Abruptly turning her eyes to the screen, she watched in wonderment as his words unfolded into reality before her. The sequence of numbers and letters that had made no sense- had no meaning before- were coming alive, multiplying and rearranging themselves impossibly.

"What- what's happening?!? Is it a virus?"

"Miss…. Vort…Mzz…."

"Fred?!?"

Fred's voice fizzled out into silence, as Cindy's wide eyes continued to scan the screen. Stomach churning, she reached out to the keys splashed out before her. She brought her fingers down upon them with alarm, only to find them unresponsive.

The lights began to flicker.

"NO!" She screamed, continuing in vain to try any button, any key she could reach- "I WILL NOT FAIL! NOT NOW-" But her words were silenced with the crash of blackness around her. The sudden night that had fallen around her was eerie- the silence, sinister. Suddenly, the screen before her flashed.

Her eyes, adjusting to the sudden change, lifted with alarm- but what she saw she could not understand.

The numbers and letters that had been multiplying like some un-earthly bacteria were gathering together, twisting and gathering into shapes and forms unknown...until they pulled, finally, into one word.

Upon the screen, it flashed...

**Aggredior**

...And as sudden as it came- it ended. The word disappeared, leaving behind its progeny- its clone, embedded upon her brain, not soon- or ever- to be forgotten. The lights returned, one bulb at a time.

The screen, filled now with simple numbers and letters once more, waited unassumingly for her input.

Still, the word circled around in her brain.

"Miss.. Miss Vortex. So sorry for my temporary absence. It seems the onscreen equation has reached its designated end. I can only assume we were attacked by a malicious virus. Oddly, it has stopped…"

"That was no virus."

"How can you be sure?"

"A virus", she said, rising from her seat slowly to lean her palms upon the controls, "is designed to destroy without notice. It has to infiltrate and demolish a system before anyone knows what hit it."

"But that is precisely what it did, Miss Vortex. I was unable to stop it- it shut down all of my defenses and weapons systems. I was dehabilitated."

"Yes. But you're still here, aren't you?"

"…yes."

"This was not meant to hurt us, Fred. It was to get our attention."

She straightened her back, crossing her arms in front of her.

"Fred," She said, cracking her knuckles in preparation for the coming storm of activity, "how's your latin?"

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Thank you so much for reading and commenting. You keep me motivated!

**acosta perez jose ramiro: **Thanks for the loyal support, haha! I look forward to your comments with each chapter, and I hope you continue to enjoy each one better than the last.

**Spellbound-Mione: **Keep reading. The twisting plot is going to be a real roller-coaster ride...but you will enjoy it, I promise...

**esine; Readrbug21; FredandGeorgetwinsoftheC.O.C.A:** Thank you, looking forward to your comments!

**jimlover54:** Done.

**mrmuscle: **Correct!


	13. Chapter 13

-1Short but pivotal chapter. I hope you enjoy and please do not forget to leave your opinion.

-**RR**

(AN at end of chapter. I do not own JN.)

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**Chapter 13**

"What does it mean?" She asked, reaching back into the recesses of her mind for an answer. Sadly, she found nothing of Latin but the single word that she was now to learn.

"**Aggredior: **to go to, approach, address, attack, begin." He replied, eyes glazed over with circuit-tracing alerted ness.

"A verb."

"Yes. A verb denoting the beginning of action to rouse or displace- to commit oneself to combat, or to prepare oneself for war."

Almost imperceptibly, her jaw tightened. _"More questions. Always more questions." _She realized, suddenly, that with every inch that her heart crawled, along the timeline to which she was committed by birth, she would have yet more to unravel- lest she, herself, unravel at last. "What- or, _who_, wants to call me to war?"

"I am of the opinion, Miss Vortex, that you are making a hasty assumption. One word can hardly by viewed as an explanation. How can we assume that was a call to war?"

"My best friend was _murdered_. The only man I've really ever loved was _slaughtered_. All the chances he- **we**- might have had- was _BLOWN TO PIECES IN THE SKY_."

She ran her hand through her hair, feeling the sticky heat of sweat between her fingers.

"Whoever did it is out there. Think about it, Fred. Someone had to have the technical expertise to pull off a rigged rocket explosion. Someone had to edit Goddard's hard drive. Someone had to place the...body... in the cockpit. All of this- and then "Aggredior"? A Latin word pumped back at us from space? Don't tell me there's no connection."

Every breath now was a threat- not in words, but in the hot, sticky scorching rage that each exhalation signified. She felt it bounce off of the screen before her as she leaned closer, a steaming osmosis back into her mind, fueling her- driving her.

"Whoever sent it- they're right. This is _war_. I don't know why they choose Jimmy- maybe they were threatened, maybe they just enjoy murder in cold blood. But whatever they're trying to do- it ends here. They won't get away with this." The bitter pledge snuck out from between her clenched teeth, narrowed eyes confirming the endlessness of the quest she would now undertake.

"And how shall you fight an invisible enemy? The virus had no discernable way of being traced."

"But the e-mail that sent it can be."

"Perhaps- but over a span of time. I have been trying to rebuild its source jumps."

The tilt of her head signified her question unuttered.

"Yes, I did quarantine it, Miss Vortex, as you wished- but I was able to retain anodyne data from the source code. I have not, in this span of time, been able to route more than seven jump points- only thirteen light-years."

"That's enough." She said, "to get started." Fingers jumping to the proper keys, she called forth her quarry: file by file, her mind raced over options.

"What, exactly, do you intend to do, Miss Vortex?"

"I'm going to find the source of the message."

"But, Miss Vortex, you are not capable of nearly as much calculation prowess as I am able to achieve- I am, after all, a computer."

"I don't mean calculation, or research, or anymore sitting around waiting for more clues to hit me in the face. I'm GOING to find the source."

"You mean-"

"Yeah. Going as in the verb. Into space."

Had Fred been human, capable of shock or awe, capable of surprise or mystified silence, he might have had the chance to display such. But his eyes washed over this human thing, this girl- and he felt no surprise at all at her declaration. But perhaps, such lack of surprise only signified as acknowledgement- a knowing between them. This was the path she would take- and even him- a simple CPU- could discern her resolve.

It certainly felt to her, for all the world, as if she was being compelled toward this decision. As if from the moment her heart had been hardened to stone by the cold clutches of his death, she was tumbling, pushed off some cliff of uncertainty to this new plateau.

And as this realization reached the back of her subconscious, to be stored in the corridors of her thoughts, she tried to ignore the roaring voice inside her head- the single word it took to drive her to furious work. It whispered to her throughout the hours- following her as she drew up plans and researched the options.

"_...Aggredior..."_

Why did it feel like she was running out of time?

JCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJCJ

**AN:**

**EmmeTwo**: Wow! Itay!? ; I'm glad you like it, I'm looking forward to your next comment.

**pl: **Glad to have a new fan! Looking forward to hearing more from you.

**mrmuscle: **Thank you -

**sk8er: **_"He that can have patience can have what he will."_ -Benjamin Franklin

**Readrbug21: **Thank you so much, I'm so glad to have retained fans that can see the changes my writing undergoes! Looking forward to hearing from you once again.

**heartsyhawk: **Thank you so much- can't wait to hear more from you as the story goes on.

**And FOREVER: **Cliffhangers are the push which propel a story off the cliff of boredom...or so I say lol

**acosta perez jose ramiro: **As always, yours is a very valued opinion. Thank you for it.


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